Even though I had purchased the gifts in advance, I hadn’t wrapped them. So Sunday morning at 9:30 (we were supposed to leave at 10:00) I started wrapping presents. I wrapped my dad’s and neice’s gifts, but when it was time to wrap my mom’s gift certificate the trouble started.
I had ordered the gift card online and it had been delivered in a large 10X12 envelope. It had been laying on our dining room table for over a week. When I looked for it on Sunday morning, it wasn’t there.
So I asked A if he had moved it.
At this point, I should mention that A has a bit of a problem. His mother has a hoarding disorder. (Undiagnosed of course) Her illness means her house is crazy cat lady dirty, without any actual cats. She has been like this as long as A can remember.
So A grew up in a messy, overstuffed house. Subsequently, he HATES clutter. Unfortunately, he also never really learned how to create a system for managing necessary household stuff. Instead, he just gets fed up and starts throwing stuff away.
Lots of stuff.
My paychecks, new things with the tags still on them, mail, coupons, books, checkbooks.
He doesn’t really look at what he is throwing out, he just goes into trash man mode.
So when my gift card envelope was missing, I feared the worst. I tried to stay calm as he looked around in the different places where it might have been stashed. Then he went out to the garbage cans. He emptied them all and still didn’t find it. He concluded he must have thrown it away before the garbage man came on Friday.
By this point, I was livid. He had THROWN AWAY my mom’s CHRISTMAS PRESENT. I controlled my temper long enough to say "You had better go get her another one. Right. NOW."
So he left immediately. Apparently, SLT was not open at 10:00 on Sunday morning. He had to give them his sob story and plead with them to get in.
When he got home, I was so mad I refused to speak to him. As we were driving the 40 minutes to my parents’ house, thought, the flood gates opened. I yelled about how he always throws my stuff away. How my things aren’t safe in my own house. I yelled about how he hates christmas and how his lack of Christmas spirit* always ruins Christmas for me. And worst of all, how Miss M was never going to really get to enjoy Christmas because he has so many Christmas issues due to his disfunctional family. And couldn’t he just get some THERAPY already and stop THROWING MY STUFF AWAY!
Throughout it all, A was a champ. He appologized profusely and promised to try harder to have the Christmas spirit. Eventually, everything was smoothed over and we moved on. I felt very self righteous.
Until last night… (Wait for it…Wait for it…)
when I found the envelope with the gift card. I had moved it when the chimney people were in the house.
After the fit I threw, I can’t tell A I found it. (I don’t think he reads this, but just in case, I am going to delete this part tomorrow).
I distroyed the envelope and secreted the gift card to my desk at work. I would have thrown it away too, but we don’t know yet if SLT was able to cancel the card. If they didn’t, it would be like throwing $50 away. If they don’t cancel it, I am going to buy stuff for myself with it.
So now I feel about >—–< this big.
But I can’t tell him because I will never live it down.
You won’t tell him, right?
*It is very difficult to have a serious arguement about someone’s lack of christmas spirit with a straight face.