Today I managed to get my care package sent off to the baby’s orphanage. I spent a lot more time than I should have fussing over what I was going to send. I also sent a three page letter expressing our gratitude and asking questions about the baby. We were only supposed to send a shoebox sized package.
Here is what I sent:
Most of what we sent was collection of baby toys for all the kids at the orphanage. I have heard there are only about 20 kids there and they are mostly babies. I kept duplicates of some of these toys so when the baby meets us, we have some familiar things to offer her. For the record, I think it is really selfish to send things only for our kid when our kid is already getting a family. I think it is better to send stuff for the kids who aren’t getting families in the immediate future. They need toys more than our baby does. These toys were mostly A) small B) lightweight C) easy to clean 4) on sale and 5) had different textures and sensory features.
In this picture, you can see the other stuff I sent. I sent gifts for the director (bottle of American ginseng), assistant director (ginseng tea), and nannies (lotions, labeled as “special fragrant spa lotions” by our chinese tutor). They were all labeled for what they are and who they are for. I also sent some random candy (werthers and lindt chocolates because they are in red and gold packaging) and stickers for any older kids at the orphanage.
For our baby, I sent a small taggies blanket (with her name embroidered in Chinese on one tag). I also sent a photo album labeled with her name an picture. It include pictures of us and some rooms in our house labeled with a short story (Hello, I am _Baby’s name__. This is my family. This is my mama….this is where I will live. This is my bed…) In the photos of the rooms, I put a small stuffed frog in each picture, as well as a picture of just the stuffed frog. I will give the baby the frog when we meet her. Also, I don’t know if you can see it, but I embroidered the words “My Family” in Chinese. This was more for the nannies’ benefit than for the baby who has yet to be named. The chinese tutor kindly told me that my characters were legible.
The most important thing we sent was the cameras. I sent two disposable cameras with the baby’s name taped to them and with a note about which button is the flash. I also sent a one time use video camera from CVS which cost about $30. I asked our chinese tutor to translate the instructions and the labels for the buttons. I don’t know if they will be able to figure it out or have time to use it, but I thought it was worth a try.
Because several people asked me what was in the letter we sent, here it is. It was largely copied from the very generous Chicagomama‘s letter and translated by our tutor (who deserves a big huge kiss for translating everything is such a timely fashion!).
Dear XXXXX Social Welfare Institute Director,
We are looking forward to visiting China and becoming parents to our little girl currently in your care. We have attached our Letter Seeking Confirmation showing our Daughter’s name and our desire to make her part of our family. We eagerly look forward to adopting BABY. Thank you for all the love and care you have given her; we are more grateful than can ever be expressed.
We are enclosing two disposable cameras in this package, hoping you might be able to take some photographs of BABY at the orphanage, with her caregivers and cribmate, and anything that you feel may be important to us or her in the future. We will keep these pictures to share with her when she is older so we can tell her about her first home. They will mean so much to us.
We have also enclosed a small video camera. If it is convenient, please record BABY with caregivers or friends who are important to her. We would be especially grateful if Baby’s caregivers would describe her disposition, things she enjoys and anything about her history that may be of interest to her in the future. We hope that hearing the voices of her caregivers will bring her comfort during her transition into our family. We have relatives who will be able to translate your words from Chinese to English for BABY when she is older.
Please accept the enclosed candy, toys, and gifts for the Director, caregivers and the other children in the orphanage. We deeply appreciate the time and effort you and your staff devote to helping orphans have a good place to live and grow.
We have enclosed the following items:
1) American Ginseng – Gift for the director
2) Ginseng tea – Gift for the director or assistant director
3) Scented Lotions – Girft for the caregivers
4) Baby toys – Gift for all the children
5) Stickers – Gift for any older children
6) Candy
Additionally, we have enclosed two small items for BABY: a photo album and a small blanket. They are clearly marked with her name. If it is convenient, please ask her caregiver to read the photo album to BABY so she can become familiar with her new family.
Enclosed is a list of questions. Answers to these questions will help us to make the transition easier for her. Thank you for taking time to answer these questions.
Thank you for all you have done for BABY. We will forever be grateful. Please hug and care for her until we can be united with her.
Questions about BABY
- Does BABY’s name have any special meaning?
- Who chose her name, and why was that name chosen?
- Does she have a nickname/petname?
- Please tell us about when, how and where she was found. Can you tell us who found her? How old do you think she was when she was found?
- Was there a note found with her, or any other memento? If there was a note/memento, could we have a copy of it?
- Do you have her finding ad? Could we have a copy of her finding ad?
- Has BABY been at XXX Orphanage since she was found? Has she been in other orphanages or in foster care?
- Do you believe that BABY is Han Chinese or the member of a minority group? If so, which minority? (The area where she lives has a large minority population).
- Is she close to a particular caregiver? What is that caregivers’s name? What (if anything) does she call her caregiver?
- Does she have a special friend or cribmate in the orphanage? What is that child’s name? Has that child been adopted?
- How would you describe her personality?
- What makes her happy?
- What makes her angry or upset?
- What are the best ways to soothe her?
- What are her favorite activities?
- Has she had health problems or allergies?
- What kinds of medical treatments has she had?
- What kind of food is she eating now? Does she have any particular likes or dislikes? What is her favorite food?
- What else would you like to tell us about her?
- Does the orphanage or caregivers need anything in particular?
- Is there a telephone number or email address so we can contact you about the orphanages’ future needs?
Lucky (capitalistic-running) dog American (Family) to have your own translator!
so jealous. we are about to put in our app for VN to IAAP.
wish we were wher eyou are in the prociess, though I am sure you have waited long enough.
I recall you posted about this a while back but I can’t recall what you said, but are you still going to pursue breastfeeding her? And on a completely, completely unrelated subject, are you still as impressed with your light box as you were initially?
Just curious…
I had no idea people did this when adopting from China (or anywhere else) until my sister became an adoptive parent. I think the camera idea is great — I really hope they take photos! If they do, get the developed somewhere good (like better than a drugstore, take them to a camera shop). I have no idea what it’s like to be an adoptee, but I imagine myself poring over those photos for years.
Wow – I love the package. I feel a little voyeuristic, since I’m not adopting myself, but I never would have thought to send toys for all the children – even if I’d found out that it was a smallish orphanage.
And I’m with Johnny – it’s great that you send letters and labels in Chinese. The ginseng tea is an especially nice touch – and that’s based on years of trying to mine the US for gifties to take back to Asia when I lived there.
Thanks for sharing your letter, namely the questions – very helpful reference. Can I ask how your are sending these items? Directly – or through someone local? Isn’t there some helpful hint re: worth of package so that the orphanage doesn’t have to pay for receipt? I’m out of the loop.
I hope you get at least some photos back– we got the photos back as well as a whole book of photos of our daughter from birth on that the director had taken all along and they are treasured! Don’t hold out too high a hope that the questions will be answered to your satisfaction. All 7 of the babies in our trip got nearly the same answers! Ah well. Any idea on TA? You all set with shots?
DS-L
Thanks for sharing so many details with us. Really neat collection. I am saving your entire post for future inspiration! And what a great idea to send additional toys! It’s funny that I’d feel a little shy about asking a whole list of questions–from fear of being (seen as) demanding–but you’ve given me the idea that it might actually be good. I hope you get a good response!
I’ll be curious to hear the answer to the cribmate/special peer friend question myself! For purely selfish reasons…
Nat has two of those toys and she has loved them both (the bee teether and the grippy ball). What a great idea about putting the stuffed frog in all the photos. What great ideas all around. I can’t wait to hear about the trip. I’m so excited for ya’ll!
All hail the power of the frog to bring people together!
Unrelated sort of… how goes it with preparing to breastfeed?
How exciting! I love the cute things you picked out! It is so sweet that you embroidered the photo album and the blanket tag. Hopefully they will become heirlooms. I saved a copy of your letter and questions to (hopefully) use in a few months. Thank you for sharing!
Thank you for sharing this care package info. It’s such a wonderful collection and the ideas are really helpful.
What a super package. Thanks for the inspiration!!!!
Thanks for all the details. I love you’re letter and we might have someone who would translate a letter for us when the time comes, too. It’s nice to get an idea of what to write.