Comments on: Black sheep http://american-family.org/2008/02/15/black-sheep/ Mon, 15 Mar 2010 20:08:51 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: chris http://american-family.org/2008/02/15/black-sheep/comment-page-1/#comment-71595 chris Sun, 17 Feb 2008 23:16:33 +0000 http://american-family.org/2008/02/15/black-sheep/#comment-71595 My family is so disfunctional, I probably don't have much to add. But I will say that my friend swears by Dream Dinners. Someone gave us one when we had the twins (frozen, to thaw when we wanted). It was good. My family is so disfunctional, I probably don’t have much to add. But I will say that my friend swears by Dream Dinners. Someone gave us one when we had the twins (frozen, to thaw when we wanted). It was good.

]]> By: a.t http://american-family.org/2008/02/15/black-sheep/comment-page-1/#comment-71522 a.t Sun, 17 Feb 2008 08:19:26 +0000 http://american-family.org/2008/02/15/black-sheep/#comment-71522 I feel exactly the same way about my mom and I can't believe it happens to other people too. I mean, my mom is lovely. She's a wonderful person and everything and I love her in the way a child is expected to love a parent but if we weren't related, there is no way I would ever get along with her. Our relationship improved so much when she moved 6000 miles away but everytime one of us visits the other, the screaming matches start. Her family used to make me feel guilty that we could only get along when she's far away, but I think we've come to terms that we need distance to maintain our relationship. I feel exactly the same way about my mom and I can’t believe it happens to other people too. I mean, my mom is lovely. She’s a wonderful person and everything and I love her in the way a child is expected to love a parent but if we weren’t related, there is no way I would ever get along with her. Our relationship improved so much when she moved 6000 miles away but everytime one of us visits the other, the screaming matches start. Her family used to make me feel guilty that we could only get along when she’s far away, but I think we’ve come to terms that we need distance to maintain our relationship.

]]> By: lisa http://american-family.org/2008/02/15/black-sheep/comment-page-1/#comment-71456 lisa Sat, 16 Feb 2008 18:57:08 +0000 http://american-family.org/2008/02/15/black-sheep/#comment-71456 No-speaking as someone who has experienced that sense of surprise about ten years longer than you-it never really goes away. Love my sisters dearly, very proud of them, very little to converse about. With my mother, it's a little weirder. We're very close. I think I connect with a part of her that she sent underground a long time ago-but, well, I just spent 3 weeks with her in China, so I am feeling very aware of the shortcomings in our connection. I do think some of that is because I look so much like my father and have a lot of his independent personality, and it scares her. Re my daughter-no connection with the picture-in person I instantly felt like I have known her all my life-can't imagine that ever changing in any way. ~lmc No-speaking as someone who has experienced that sense of surprise about ten years longer than you-it never really goes away. Love my sisters dearly, very proud of them, very little to converse about. With my mother, it’s a little weirder. We’re very close. I think I connect with a part of her that she sent underground a long time ago-but, well, I just spent 3 weeks with her in China, so I am feeling very aware of the shortcomings in our connection. I do think some of that is because I look so much like my father and have a lot of his independent personality, and it scares her.
Re my daughter-no connection with the picture-in person I instantly felt like I have known her all my life-can’t imagine that ever changing in any way. ~lmc

]]> By: Ashley http://american-family.org/2008/02/15/black-sheep/comment-page-1/#comment-71360 Ashley Sat, 16 Feb 2008 01:59:26 +0000 http://american-family.org/2008/02/15/black-sheep/#comment-71360 My brother and I are at two seperate ends as well. When it's just he and I at the dinner table at my parent's house we look at each other blankley trying to find a sentence to say. I'm sure he has the same thoughts as I do- "we were raised by the same people?" I's sure that when my parents die we will likely never see each other again. It should bother me, but it doesn't. "I hate to think that one day I will look at them or they will look at me and feel a void." So true. My brother and I are at two seperate ends as well. When it’s just he and I at the dinner table at my parent’s house we look at each other blankley trying to find a sentence to say. I’m sure he has the same thoughts as I do- “we were raised by the same people?” I’s sure that when my parents die we will likely never see each other again. It should bother me, but it doesn’t.

“I hate to think that one day I will look at them or they will look at me and feel a void.”

So true.

]]> By: cherylc http://american-family.org/2008/02/15/black-sheep/comment-page-1/#comment-71352 cherylc Sat, 16 Feb 2008 00:18:34 +0000 http://american-family.org/2008/02/15/black-sheep/#comment-71352 This really scares me too. My family is actually pretty close, we see each other regularly and I really like my sisters. I think one thing, for us, was watching my mother grow ill and die. An experience like that can obviously destroy relationships, but in our case it brought us together. But why? What were the variables? I have no idea. My immediate family (my husband and daughter) are so close now, it's hard to imagine that would change. But, who knows. I try to remember that we only have the present moment, and lots of things I've worried about never came to pass. (Platitudes, maybe, but helpful ones for me.) This really scares me too. My family is actually pretty close, we see each other regularly and I really like my sisters. I think one thing, for us, was watching my mother grow ill and die. An experience like that can obviously destroy relationships, but in our case it brought us together. But why? What were the variables? I have no idea.

My immediate family (my husband and daughter) are so close now, it’s hard to imagine that would change. But, who knows. I try to remember that we only have the present moment, and lots of things I’ve worried about never came to pass. (Platitudes, maybe, but helpful ones for me.)

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