We just returned from Meet the Teacher day (aka check out all the kids and their parents day).
The BAD: When we got there, we got the news that M’s kindergarten teacher will be out of school on maternity leave until mid-november. This is a huge bummer to me. When I was in kindergarten, my teacher was out on maternity leave for a very long time and it was a very disjointed, weird year. I hope they manage it better for M’s class.
The GOOD: I couldn’t believe it, but M’s class has at least 8 kids of color out of maybe 17 or 18 kids. In addition to M, there was another half-Chinese girl we had met earlier, an Asian girl, two or three south Asian kids, and three kids who were African American or AA biracial. There may have also been a Hispanic kid. It was hard to tell because they were all running around and there were some extra siblings in the room too. I thought we would be lucky to get just 2 other kids, so I was really happy. I don’t know if all the all-day classes are that diverse, if the school chose to clump them together or if the demographics are shifting toward more diversity. Either way, it is good for M.
The Parents: I am going to come right out and say my concerns about M’s lunch and appearance in kindergarten seem to be unfounded. You didn’t have to look at the kids at ALL to figure out who would be the popular and/or not picked on kids later. All you had to do was check out the parents. You could tell right away who the Very Involved Parents (VIPs) were going to be and how that would trickle down to their kids.
I can tell already, M’s bento box will not be an issue. At least not this year.
Tomorrow, the school year starts in earnest. We survived the summer. Thank you UNIVERSE.
My kindergarten teacher was awful! That was the first of many lessons in that some teachers can’t see past the “pretty kids.” And if you accuse a pk of making fun of your hand deformities? The teacher will call you a cry baby and tell you to sit down. Fortunately, my 1st grade teacher is still my hero.
One of the articles I read today on school dynamics talked about how some teachers enable and perpetuate the clique dynamics. I think that was very true in my experience-and may be why I had more good than bad in school.
Glad it was a good first impression. ~lmc
huh, I was fairly well unliked all around in school and it never once crossed my mind that it was anything to do with my parents’ involvement…is it different these days or something? ha, maybe I still have no idea why I was so low on the ladder…after all these years.
“All you had to do was check out the parents. You could tell right away who the Very Involved Parents (VIPs) were going to be and how that would trickle down to their kids.”
I want to hear more about this. What did the different kinds of parents look like? Which category are you? Which am I?
I certainly wouldn’ worry at all about the bento box. At A’s school (we’re in a fairly ritzy central California town) almost all of the kids are “green” with bento box style lunches…if you send packaged food for your kids it’s a no no. All the kids come with “different” foods. Because of your post I asked my son who is in 2nd grade about what his friends eat at lunch and he said “I don’t know”. BUT, he’s a boy, and that might be why. R would be able to tell you every single thing that the person she is sittting next to her was eating and she’s only 3 1/2. Haha!!!
Sounds like a very uneventful start to kindergarten. When I started kindergarten, the teacher scared the crap out of me on the first day by hitting a table with a ruler. I refused to go back after that first day and my parents had to find another school within a day to put me into. Maybe that’s why I never did well socially in school. =)
Glad you guys had a good first day. And the bento boxes sound so cool, I think if anything, M’s classmates would be bugging their parents to do the same for them too.
Hmm. My sister is a kindergarten teacher out on maternity until November. Coincidence? Haha. Just kidding. She teaches in a place with zero diversity so it cannot be the same person.
Good luck in kindergarten, M!
I am also curious as to which parent I would have been
I really hope one of the cool ones. Hee.
I seem to be quibbling all over your blog lately, but I’d love to hear your theory about VIPs and their kids’ popularity, too, because kid charisma and parental involvement haven’t overlapped in any obvious way down here so far. (Some of the shyest, least popular kids have the most involved parents, because the parents are making sure to volunteer and be present for their children.)
My boy starts Kindergarten on Wednesday. From what I saw at the open house, it’s a fairly diverse group, but we’re pretty lucky in that because we’re with all the military kids. I do love that about military bases.
The teacher had a project where the kids picked out paper bodies and used decorations to make “themselves.” The bodies came in about 3 different shades, and my son (who is pastier than I am, if that’s possible) picked the darkest brown one. I watched the teacher closely at this, but she said nothing. So I’m liking her so far.
For more on the school dynamics you should read “Queen Bee Moms and Kingpin Dads”. After a few years at M’s school you will swear that the author was at YOUR school.
I’d also like to hear more about your theories of parental involvement – they sound interesting.
Help!! Today was orientation – the Kissing Hand is ok but there is a family tree to fill out! On the first day! There are lots of adopted kids in this school!
The teacher’s idea was to just fill it out with my husband’s and my families. So much for my careful “you have a family in China and they are the family that looks like you, we are your family here and we are the family that will always be with you and help you grow up”.
I have always claimed I would fill out any family tree project starting with Lucy the protohominid, ending with the entire class including teacher – but I don’t want her to be a pariah because her mother is badly behaved. So in the end, I don’t have the nerve to do it and then have my daughter suffer the consequences. But – really, not a happy beginning.