(See the title up there, you should totally read that as bull-ay points. Like it is French. That will make this post seem more exotic and classy.)
- We are skipping Mr. A’s work Xmas prom tomorrow night. Given the state of the economy, I didn’t want to spend $150 on a new outfit for a boring (but free) steak dinner. Besides, I always get wasted on the free drinks and end up sitting next to a partner and have to try to not make an ass out of myself for two full hours which is really, really hard for me when I am drunk.
- Instead of the Xmas prom, Mr. A and I are going to have an actual date night before he comes home and tries to cram in a few more hours of work. He has been working a LOT in the last three weeks trying to make sure he makes his numbers (the amount of billable hours he is supposed to hit each year) and the poor guy is looking really exhausted. While we all know he is cramming now because he wasn’t billing enough earlier in the year, billing so much in a month full of holidays is hard nevertheless. He is working his usual 9 hour days then adding another 3-5 hours each night at home. I don’t know how lawyers who work in bigger cities with higher billing requirements survive. It is miserable.
- I am working on L’s lifebook. I should have done it a long time ago, but I didn’t so I am doing it now. I have maybe 3-4 sections left to go. I feel like there is a lot of pressure. I am writing a three to five year old version so there are a lot of pictures and a lot of explaining that must be boiled down into preschooler digestible-bites. It is a task that I am completing with a heavy heart. While we talk about her adoption, she doesn’t get it yet. Sooner or later, this information is going to be painful. I wish I could negate that somehow, but I can’t. The story is what it is and sugar-coating it won’t make it any easier to hear.
- Mr. A’s car died so we are currently sharing one car and supplementing by borrowing Mr. A’s dad’s car two days a week. So far, it hasn’t been much of a problem. I am trying to hold out on buying a new car until we know what is going on with the crappy house I want to buy. Mr. A would rather just buy a used car/minivan now while the economy is in the toilet and they are super-cheap.
- So far, we have been kind of insulated from the nasty economic goings on out there in the world (knock on wood). It makes me feel a little vulture-like to swoop in on good deals (crappy foreclosed house and cheap used cars) that are only good deals because other people are really hurting. But at the same time, a good deal is a good deal, I guess.
- I made one of the worst meals in my entire cooking career last night. Tonight, I am going to try to redeem myself by making sauerbraten. It has been marinading for 72 hours now, so it had better effing taste good.
Can I ask a dumb question about your lifebook? I have been putting it off for my five year-old, not because of any emotional blocks at all but because I’m stuck on format. Silly, I know. What format are you using? I am thinking of doing a simple, non-fancy looseleaf binder with the pages in plastic sheet protectors. I’m so not a scrapbooker and it really bugs me when people do all the silly Asian-related graphics (not to mention ladybug type stuff). I just want to find a format that’s practical. Any ideas?
This is the land of opportunity! Seize those deals and cram the guilt! ;’}If you plate it up all pretty, you should post a pic of your sauerbraten to enlighten those of us who’ve never seen any.
I checked out the wiki article about sauerbraten. Which kind are you making?
I have not been able to make myself do a lifebook. I think when I ever do, it will be all-digital.
If it is ok to ask – how will you be explaining the basics of first family and what adoption is to L?
I have been telling our daughter that she has a family in China and the people in that family look like her, but there are some laws in China and the way things are in China that sometimes people cannot keep their babies (then I go through the long list of other adoptees from China we know and how the same thing happened to them). When she asked why I told her that life can be very hard. I guess overall, I wanted to make it something that happens to a lot of people and is no one’s fault, nor even necessarily anyone’s choice – I want to try to counteract her wondering why it happened specifically to her. We have no information at all so there are only whatever generalities I come up with; I doubt I’d do the same if I did have any concrete knowledge. I am trying to teach her a tiny bit of modern Chinese history to explain things – she has heard of Mao and of the Cultural Revolution, though I don’t know that she is retaining much at this age. The main thing I can be sure I have accomplished by doing this is that our other local Chinese adoptee families think I am completely weird.
wow that is a long comment. If it is too long please feel free to delete it!
Just a heads-up to folks that Amber archived Chicagomama’s Lifebook posts and you can find them in her category listing over on the left taskbar there. I don’t think that Chicagomama ever finished those posts, but the ones that exist were fascinating.
I have to attend a Christmas party this Saturday night, a business-related thing in a person’s home, and I’ve got some low-level anxiety about it. We’ve managed to avoid most of this category of professional socializing, much to my relief in the past. Now I’m worried that I’m out of practice on these things.
Want to hear more about lifebook. Laughed at end of first bullet point. Thought of you on Thanksgiving
Skipping the work shindig and going out on a date sounds like a great idea. It can be so hard when you don’t have much time together.
Good luck with the sauerbraten. And the lifebook. The trainwreck of dinner sounds interesting…tell us more. Misery loves company. I have had weeks in which every night I start dinner by saying, if it is as bad as I think, let’s just get pizza.