Today we received a Christmas card from my Mother In Law.  Included in it was a check for $600.

She is still stuck on the idea that we are penniless.

She has harbored suspicions that Mr. A has not been working since the election (because firing everyone the day after the election makes SO MUCH SENSE).

Apparently, when she opened our refrigerator and cupboards and they didn’t have much food in them, she believed she has uncovered our secret:  We only had ONE box of cereal.  There was a WHOLE SHELF that was empty in the fridge.

The HORROR!  Not an EMPTY SHELF!

That is when she became sure we were “trying to pull the wool over her eyes.”

(In case anyone is new here, my MIL is a freaking HOARDER.  Her judgement about the amount of stuff someone should have is seriously questionable.)

We tore up the check, but even if we had been in really dire straights it would barely make a dent in our monthly expenses–it wouldn’t even cover our school loan payments.  Not to mention, my MIL does not have any business giving away $600 even if we were broke.  She is supporting Mr. A’s mentally ill sister and any extra money should be directed there or toward her retirement or SOMETHING.   Not to us.

As if the hoarding didn’t make it 100% clear, MIL is clearly afflicted with some kind of obession disorder.  Lucky us, we are her current focus.

As if the obsession was not annoying enough, whenever my MIL opens her mouth, the things that come out are inevitably offensive.  Yesterday she told Mr. A (who really should just stop answering her calls) that we “treat the girls like orphans in their own home” because we lectured M and we don’t have any food available.

Unfortunately, knowing that she is crazy does not make me less annoyed or angry with her bullshit.  She is coming to visit for a day around the holidays, but she is no longer has the option of sleeping at our house for a while.  If she can’t behave in a socially acceptable way, she can’t stay here.  I will also be conveniently away when she visits for the day.  If I have to listen to her crazy, I may actually lose it and start yelling at her.

I should have known better than to think this trip to Taiwan together might actually be pleasant.  I can see right now, it is going to be as fun as shoving slivers of glass under my fingernails.