Before I start, I have been thinking about doing this for a while:  If I start referring to the girls as Elle (L)and Em (M) is it  less confusing than L and M?  Do two E names seem as confusing as just initials?  Someone who has read me for a while told me that initials are still confusing to her.  Yes, no?  What do you think?

http://www.easypolls.net/poll.html?p=4e36960ec83fb0e41b3f6f97

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Yesterday, something amazing happened.  L learned to swim.  As with almost anything involving L, learning to swim didn’t happen the easy way.  It involved a lot of tears, a tantrum, threats and a bribe.

Many years ago, when she was 2, L slipped under the water for a second at swimming lessons.  Seriously, it was less than a second before Mr. A grabbed her and pulled her back to her feet.  She was never in any danger, but she never forgot that she was scared.  She refused to put her head near the water for TWO YEARS after that.  This girl has the memory of an elephant.  She never forgets.

After many, many lessons, L has made a little progress since then.  She will blow bubbles, she will play in the water (though she hasn’t been able to move out of the level 1 class after FOUR sessions).  She will jump of the side if you hold her hand—unless she is wearing floaties.  With floaties, she is a daredevil who yells “Cannonball!” as she bellyflops in the pool.

L loves to paddle around using floaties, but they are obviously a crutch that lets her avoid learning to swim the right way.  I have been kind of lax about making her practice without floaties, but yesterday I was bored and Mr. A was playing with M, so I told L she had to practice for a few minutes without them.  She needed to take them off and show me how she could use her arms and legs for swimming like she had at lessons last week (2 kicks, two arms were the best she had done so far.)

I could tell she was nervous.  She thought about it.  She refused.  She tried to bargain. She got mad and yelled. I made her get out and sit in a chair until she was willing to give it a try.  She threw a huge hissy fit. After about 10 minutes of ridiculousness, I got fed up and made her get in the water where she screeched and yelled like I was killing her (she was actually just standing there in water where she could touch.)  I could feel the disapproval from both my mom and Mr. A because I was ruining L’s fun day at the pool.

Finally, I told her she could have icecream last night if she only tried it one time.  If you know L, you know that food is her ultimate motivator.  She will do pretty much anything for a sucker or a piece of gum.  Ice cream was above and beyond her wildest dreams.

After waffling for a few more teary minutes, she decided to give it a try.  She put on her goggles and went for it.

Wouldn’t you know, she did it!   She swam from one end of the steps to the middle of the steps!

We all jumped up and down and cheered.  I picked L up and twirled her around in the air.  She was laughing and excited before she remembered she had been crying only a minute before and reverted to a few last sobs to make the point of how mistreated she has been.

Then she spent the next two hours REFUSING to put her floaties back on while she swam back and forth and back and forth.  She not only showed us she could do a beginner version of the crawl stroke, she let me teach her how to breast stroke AND swim underwater.  After the first hour, I started wishing she would just put on her floaties so I could sit in the shade already.

Here is the thing about L:  She doesn’t like to try new things.  She has to be dragged kicking and screaming (sometimes literally) if  she thinks there is even the slightest chance she will fail.  This is annoying, especially when we know she can do what we are asking.

But if you can push her out of comfort zone and give her just the tiniest taste of success?

There is no stopping her.

(The converse of this, of course, is if she fails or feels embarrassed by messing up she will NEVER EVER try again.  This is why I couldn’t be more than 3 feet from her as she practiced her new skill.  One inhalation of water or moment of panic and it would take years for us to get her back in the pool without floaties.  Every time I saw her starting to flail or accidentally swim toward the drop off to the deeper part, I had to swoop in before she noticed she was in trouble.)

Last night, we all went out for victory ice cream.  L kept saying “This ice cream is for ME, right?  Because I was scared but then I was brave!  And now I can swim!”

That victory ice cream was the sweetest ice cream ever.